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Apr. 14th, 2008 | 10:47 am
Things:
1.
My friend bought me this dress/took this picture this weekend in an attempt to RUIN MY REPUTATION. And Jesus Christ, am I not eye-crossingly situated right at the intersection between Fucking Hot and Incredibly Goofy-Looking? When I look at me, I am reminded that men all start out as women in the womb.
2) On Saturday, Valmonte conned me into modeling naked again with the promise of: multiple naked people all posing together, the thrill of volunteering (as always: you don't pay me = I DOES WHAT I LIKES!), and a Clockwork Orange theme. A giant pink snake-puppet made love to me and I had to go sit in the most boring East Village winebar in the world (named... get ready for it: "WineBar") to recover.
3) At the Winebar I eavesdropped on the beautiful, expensively-dressed people around me and heard not ONE conversation that involved: A) asking of interesting questions, B) revelations of strange epiphanies, C) tender soul-baring, or D) a single honest burst of laughter. And I thought: I'm going to die alone.
4) On Sunday I met up with a few new friends and took an edible-foods foraging tour through Central Park, learning about black birch, spicebush, juneberry, japanese knotweed, chickweed, burdock, wild violet, daylily, elm, curly dock, pine, raspberry leaf, and dandilion. More than that, I met people who were interesting. Not beautiful or astonishingly dressed, but interesting. Is it really true that beautiful people are usually boring? And is the converse usually true as well? But then, so many people are boring after half an hour. At any rate, now I can walk through Harlem and freak people out, chewing on bright yellow dandilion heads (they taste like sweet coffee!)
5) Just finished my taxes and elbowed my cat in the face (or, rather, he faced me in the elbow.) My cat loves me much much more since I started punishing him with Bitter Apple. Everyone loves an Alpha.
1.
My friend bought me this dress/took this picture this weekend in an attempt to RUIN MY REPUTATION. And Jesus Christ, am I not eye-crossingly situated right at the intersection between Fucking Hot and Incredibly Goofy-Looking? When I look at me, I am reminded that men all start out as women in the womb.
2) On Saturday, Valmonte conned me into modeling naked again with the promise of: multiple naked people all posing together, the thrill of volunteering (as always: you don't pay me = I DOES WHAT I LIKES!), and a Clockwork Orange theme. A giant pink snake-puppet made love to me and I had to go sit in the most boring East Village winebar in the world (named... get ready for it: "WineBar") to recover.
3) At the Winebar I eavesdropped on the beautiful, expensively-dressed people around me and heard not ONE conversation that involved: A) asking of interesting questions, B) revelations of strange epiphanies, C) tender soul-baring, or D) a single honest burst of laughter. And I thought: I'm going to die alone.
4) On Sunday I met up with a few new friends and took an edible-foods foraging tour through Central Park, learning about black birch, spicebush, juneberry, japanese knotweed, chickweed, burdock, wild violet, daylily, elm, curly dock, pine, raspberry leaf, and dandilion. More than that, I met people who were interesting. Not beautiful or astonishingly dressed, but interesting. Is it really true that beautiful people are usually boring? And is the converse usually true as well? But then, so many people are boring after half an hour. At any rate, now I can walk through Harlem and freak people out, chewing on bright yellow dandilion heads (they taste like sweet coffee!)
5) Just finished my taxes and elbowed my cat in the face (or, rather, he faced me in the elbow.) My cat loves me much much more since I started punishing him with Bitter Apple. Everyone loves an Alpha.

Alphas love Omegas
from:
chocolatebark
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 04:02 pm (UTC)
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Omegas recognizable by what exactly?
from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 04:40 pm (UTC)
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Sometimes the two go hand in hand!
from:
chocolatebark
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 04:46 pm (UTC)
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Omega Personalities
Omega individuals normally have primary characteristics from the 1-2-6 (Will-Love-Idealistic) combination of behaviors. They do not fit the Jungian classifications of dipolar opposites. They display combined Jungian opposing behaviors. They have integrated behaviors in that they are thinker-feelers and intuitive-sensors adapting these behaviors to situations as needed. They are self-actualizers requiring little outside influence to take appropriate actions to correct misunderstandings in personal relationships. They exhibit "tough love" characteristics when dealing with dysfunctional people and they are true to their ideals. Personal relationships are very real and meaningful for the Omega Type. They develop very secure and long lasting relationships.
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Re: Sometimes the two go hand in hand!
from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 04:47 pm (UTC)
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never heard of this model before though! learning is fun!
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Re: Omegas recognizable by what exactly?
from:
lucydsntloveyou
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 05:50 pm (UTC)
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Re: Omegas recognizable by what exactly?
from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:11 pm (UTC)
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(no subject)
from:
jellomarx
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 04:10 pm (UTC)
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You are no longer allowed to refer to yourself as ugly. The world has proof to the contrary!
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 04:41 pm (UTC)
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from:
jellomarx
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 09:10 pm (UTC)
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from:
soleiluna
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 04:23 pm (UTC)
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2. A world where everything is named what it actually is is impossible. Self-referencing naming would be better if it was really an attempt at that, rather than wry irony - or laziness.
3. I bet they were all still looking for love. In spite of themselves.
4. This is such a fantastic juxtaposition. Denizens of the big city wandering through the chance greenery, grazing here and there.
Kat (reading the organic gardener): You know you can eat daylilies?
Dawg: I am commenting on a post involving that right now.
Kat: That's really odd.
5. I bet your cat respects you more. 'Cause the alpha gets respect. And I bet there are cats that love the taste of bitter apple. Somewhere.
This comment brought to you by congestion bad enough to keep me home from work and fair trade coffee.
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 04:39 pm (UTC)
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Japanese knotweed tastes like rhubarab.
Twigs of black birch taste like root beer.
Pictures DO usually spark more comments, but then I feel totally lame.
What would you be named if you were self-referentially named? I am not a Christy, nor a wonderleafy. Maybe The Human Equivalent of Henry?
Wouldn't "The Human Equivalent of Henry" be a great name for a dry British comedy?
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ISO my one true name
from:
soleiluna
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 05:44 pm (UTC)
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*
What would you be named if you were self-referentially named?
This is a Zen koan, isn't it? It shouldn't be answered in words then. Imagine me pointing at the ground at my feet. I think that's the answer.
My tendency, of course, would be to point to my head. But I know that confuses the map with the territory.
And since I, like you, have been looking for a new name, maybe I'll have to do something with that.
*
And now I have Lisa Lisa and the Cult Jam's "Head to Toe" stuck on repeat inside my brain. Oh, dear.
Bedroom eyes, head back to the side
*
The Human Equivalent of Henry suggests that Henry is not human. This is one of those "Henry discovers he is actually from outer space and that he has a clone version of himself on a faraway planet" affairs, isn't it?
But that seems so distinctly American. In the British adaptation of the American novel, Henry's doppelganger will be across the Channel and named Henri. No outer space. Just berets.
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Re: ISO my one true name
from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 05:49 pm (UTC)
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Is that American?
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(no subject)
from:
kornleaf
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 05:48 pm (UTC)
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very high in vitamin c
delicious
and calming.
i am very sure i could survive in central park like some sort of bridge troll, living off of plants and tourists that get lost.
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 05:52 pm (UTC)
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Perhaps you mean you'd rifle through their pockets for half-eaten Mars bars.
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from:
kornleaf
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:04 pm (UTC)
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but then again,
i like to take care of my body and there is no way of telling what people are full of these days.
I have come to he conclusion that my chameleon-like nature would fit in well in NY.
maybe i should try the east coast for a bit.
you ever going to head back this way?
rachelle says hi by the way.
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(no subject)
from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:07 pm (UTC)
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And, yeah, I'll be in SoCal for work and my brother's wedding in a few months, but don't know when I'll be back in NorCal... NY is a wonderful place for reinvention. If you don't like what you're doing or who you are, just move ten blocks and your entire world hits reset.
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from:
kornleaf
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:13 pm (UTC)
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i just can't spell.
do you have aim or some other means of communication that is more, um, better?
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:19 pm (UTC)
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from:
kornleaf
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:26 pm (UTC)
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would love to talk more and get to know who
my lovely
is spending time with.
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 07:02 pm (UTC)
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from:
kornleaf
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 07:42 pm (UTC)
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and apparently she likes me to.
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from:
apresminuit
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:25 pm (UTC)
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:32 pm (UTC)
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from:
apresminuit
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:42 pm (UTC)
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from:
this5amblue
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:29 pm (UTC)
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Had to say it, had to share, and now I have.
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 06:33 pm (UTC)
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I think I'm gonna sign up for one of those hair model deals where they pay you $150 to GO RADICAL.
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from:
squeela
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 08:24 pm (UTC)
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It wasn't the Winebar near Wooster, was it? The worst sex I ever had is employed there.
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 08:26 pm (UTC)
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i think if the worst sex you ever had is employed at a winebar, you're probably having at least semi-upscale horrible sex. i'm happy for you!
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from:
thatsevenbetter
date: Apr. 14th, 2008 11:11 pm (UTC)
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 15th, 2008 03:45 am (UTC)
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If you want me to help you write a resume, I'm pretty good at that shit. I'd be happy to lend a hand...
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from:
thatsevenbetter
date: Apr. 15th, 2008 03:50 am (UTC)
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accessorize accessorize accessorize!!!
from:
1123feetup
date: Apr. 15th, 2008 01:45 am (UTC)
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you're new outfit is missing something though. hmm...wait, i know what it is. THAT teddy bear hat you always used to where when you were roaming! then the get up would seem like you. have you retired that shit anyway? did it go when you quit moving? i hope you still have it, even if you don't wear it. it'd be the shinning piece in the leafy museum once your work on this world is done.
and not necessarily pertaining to you but maybe, and definitely to me:
it is strange how we become where we are once there long enough. it varies from person to person and the place. i know that since i have been staying up here on the mountain i have totally become the movie deliverance. my beard and long and scruffy and gross. i've grown accustom to the white lightening that i buy from a ninety-four year old man who distills it on his property. i've always loved playing the banjo but now it is all i enjoy doing, more than any other instrument. and i've even started bathing in the stream everyday. i know that sounds extreme but there is a logical reason. it comes straight from a natural spring that i damned up. the water is much more clean than the water that comes from the well that goes to the house.
i haven't started wearing overalls yet though. soon.
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from:
hazel_shea
date: Apr. 15th, 2008 12:39 pm (UTC)
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I do acknowledge that this may be because I am english and therefore never see people walking around new york in fancy dresses and heels with big glasses and shopping bags, except when I am watching SATC.
But whatever, the dress rocks.
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from:
daleloco
date: Apr. 15th, 2008 01:19 pm (UTC)
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from:
wonderleafy
date: Apr. 15th, 2008 02:34 pm (UTC)
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from:
daleloco
date: Apr. 15th, 2008 05:26 pm (UTC)
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Actually, just joking, I have little tolerance for the addicted.
But, you know, most artists or most interesting people aren't rich (the rich interesting people are probably doing something productive with their money), and they aren't commonly going to be hanging out somewhere like a wine bar, especially when they are having difficulty paying their rent. Just saying.
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