In my happiness and beyond. - because I think a number of you would like this right now. i always do.

I was crankily preparing for my internet-date on Friday night--or rather, aggressively NOT preparing for that which I may or may not at later time have chosen to REFER to as a "date"--when I remembered Credo.  Especially:  those who seek their own happiness do not find it.  And I thought, you know?  This is what's changed.  This is why dating sucks in New York.  Everyone's so snotty about what they deserve from other people, because of how great they themselves are.  I enjoyed being a masseuse (much of the time) and people enjoyed coming to me, because I wasn't in it for MY happiness.  The money, maybe, but I never cared much about MY happiness.  I just wanted the other person to feel they'd spent their time well.

So I stopped myself.  Changed into a pair of tight black jeans and a black cashmere sweater, nice bra, pumps, make-up, let my hair down (secret weapon).  And I said, "Being as I don't really care about having a boyfriend, I'll just spend tonight trying to show this guy a good time and forget about me, and it will be lovely."

And it was.