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Mar. 21st, 2008 | 07:16 am

Woke up trembling, head aching, stomach full of bile, throat hurting from the bile, heart racing. Cat chewing through another wire.

Apologies to the people I'm failing to attend to. I spent all night last night alone, in the tub, reading the New Yorker, drinking herbal tea. It helped some. Then I woke up.

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Comments {19}

jellomarx

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from: [info]jellomarx
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:39 am (UTC)
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Are you alright, kid? You've had a rough winter.

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Leafy

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from: [info]wonderleafy
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:41 am (UTC)
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STRESS.

Things will get better starting... next Friday?

I should probably go work out, but I haven't even been out of bed and I feel like I'm gonna faint.

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jellomarx

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from: [info]jellomarx
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:43 am (UTC)
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If you feel like fainting, DON'T WORK OUT! What's the stress about?

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Leafy

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from: [info]wonderleafy
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:46 am (UTC)
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Work, mostly.
Lots of guilt about failing my friends, for some reason.
Thus, the hiding, alone, not dealing with it.

I have a fever alternating with cold sweats now.

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jellomarx

(no subject)

from: [info]jellomarx
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:51 am (UTC)
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Who are you failing? The best way to help your friends is by first helping yourself.

You're a good person, try to get rid of the guilt, it's a waste of time and energy.

Believe me I am a NY Jew, hence an expert on guilt.

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jellomarx

(no subject)

from: [info]jellomarx
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:57 am (UTC)
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Why is next Friday so significant?

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Leafy

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from: [info]wonderleafy
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:59 am (UTC)
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I'll have finished hosting my first exhibit at a major conference. I'm still putting the whole thing together, which I've never done before, and due to a lot of political stuff with my company (that has nothing to do with anything I've done or could do, luckily), I don't have a lot of support. But a lot rides on it. And, due to the political stuff, I'm also worried about a) my salary and b) my job. Which never helps.

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jellomarx

(no subject)

from: [info]jellomarx
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 12:09 pm (UTC)
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I wish that there were magic words that could stop you from worrying about that which is clearly beyond your control.

You're not boastful. Yet you've said that you're an asset to your company. Therefore, it must be true.

I know that you're great with people. If you can, don't concern yourself with letting down friends for the next week. Your friends will understand. You've always been there for them.

Pay yourself first.

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Leafy

(no subject)

from: [info]wonderleafy
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 12:12 pm (UTC)
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No, I know they need me, and we're a good team, and my boss affirms that all the time. This is just a little bit much. Next time, it'll be easier. I'll know about all the support systems that I didn't know about this time, and we'll have more of what we need from the beginning.

I feel bad about letting down friends, because I feel like a lot of the friendships are new and tenuous and I can't get away with it, and shouldn't.



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jellomarx

(no subject)

from: [info]jellomarx
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 01:07 pm (UTC)
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Sorry, I didn't mean to abandon you, but my PDA kept crashing. I'm at my desk now so all is well.

It's one week. Your friends have their own obligations that will at times take them away from you. They will all understand or they are not friends.

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Leafy

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from: [info]wonderleafy
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 01:16 pm (UTC)
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No 'abandoning'! No feeling guilty! I can't keep both you AND me from feeling guilty today. We will all be okay.

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jellomarx

(no subject)

from: [info]jellomarx
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 01:24 pm (UTC)
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I don't feel guilty. That's a first.

This may be wrong, but your appearance will draw people to the booth. Your personality will make the presentation fine, and I know that you'll be well prepared.

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Deep Sonar

Keep drinking water

from: [info]chocolatebark
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:40 am (UTC)
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Damn, I hope you feel better soon.

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Leafy

Re: Keep drinking water

from: [info]wonderleafy
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 11:42 am (UTC)
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Thanks.

Grabbed a bottle (of water) on your sayso. Still not out of bed, tho.

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stop hitting yourself why are you hitting yourself

(no subject)

from: [info]apresminuit
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 12:19 pm (UTC)
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you need more sleep. fuck work, stay in bed. you should try to eat something, too, bread or crackers, something starchy. i feel for you, pookie, i really do. bellyaches are the worst. i am sending you vibes of healingness & love. *wiggles magic fingerz*

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Leafy

(no subject)

from: [info]wonderleafy
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 12:26 pm (UTC)
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is starch really okay? cos i ask myself what my body wants, and it says "bagels and mild cheese..."

exercise sounds terrible, but i should probably go...

first some work... just get a few things done, mid-day bike session will feel better with a few things done...

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stop hitting yourself why are you hitting yourself

you are a trooper, kiddo

from: [info]apresminuit
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 12:38 pm (UTC)
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starchy stuff is easy to digest & sponges up excess acids or something. a bagel is perfect & unless you're sensitive to dairy, mild cheese is probably okay. personally, the 1st thing i do w/ an acidy tum is drink a big old glass of milk. this is not a good idea if think you might hurl, of course, but for me anyway, it combats acid (esp. heartburn which i get all the time FROM STRESS) like a champ.

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Leafy

Re: you are a trooper, kiddo

from: [info]wonderleafy
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 01:15 pm (UTC)
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And! all this starch (I got TWO bagels and TWO bananas and a choclit milk) will crush any confidence I had in going to an orgy on Saturday. Which is probably for the best.

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stop hitting yourself why are you hitting yourself

Re: you are a trooper, kiddo

from: [info]apresminuit
date: Mar. 21st, 2008 01:22 pm (UTC)
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yeah, maybe it'd be better to sit this one out. i mean, you wouldn't wanna be in the middle of something delicate & end up puking all over your partner(s)... but, then again, they might be into that, so... ?

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